Whenever we meet new people socially or start working with new people, there can be an adjustment period where we "get to know each other" and get a baseline on each other's personalities. There can definitely be some conflict and friction during this time. At work, this can be compounded by titles or positions. We've all encountered the guy who tells us everything they've done in their career. That's ok but what happens when that same person one ups everything you mention about your career when they (hopefully) ask about your background? Did they forget to discuss their experience, only to remember when their memory was jogged by your experience? A true "one upper" will always deliver the last point in a discussion or conversation. Is this ok? Is it just their personality to interact in this way? Could they really be amazing at everything they thought of and were reminded of when you discussed you?
I am an introvert. People that talk a ton don't necessarily bother me as long as they (mostly) know what they are talking about and share the floor a bit. After all, I realize I'm not always the best guy to keep conversations going. Do extroverts get annoyed with introverts because they feel they have to carry the conversation? I couldn't tell you because I am pretty comfortable with a little silence to collect my thoughts and make sure I understand what's going on so that I don't make a fool of myself when I speak. When I was younger, I was told that me being quiet made others feel like I was stuck up. They thought I was judging them. Interestingly, I learned this tidbit of info after I physically stopped a kid who was physically picking on me in football because he and a few other guys thought my silence was judgement. We actually became friends after this went down. It's kind of funny what a quick show of force can do for respect and the conversation. I still remember this interaction and do my best to make sure me being a little less talkative isn't judged as being judgy.
I learned from football fight event when I was younger and do my best to be talkative while still being true to my introvert self. Could overly talkative extroverts tone things down and still be true to their personality? Is it just personality if we are on either end of the talk all the time or none at all spectrum? Extremes in any situation can be a sign of a bigger issue. I think early conversations with new people can be the same. If an introvert can't talk a bit and if an extrovert can't stop talking long enough to take a breath, it's going to take a while to grow a relationship.
Maybe it's because I'm an introvert but I really like Abraham Lincoln's quote about silence and talking. He stated, "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt." This and a couple of other Lincoln quotes were discussed in an earlier post.
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